Saturday, December 24, 2005

An open letter

Dear Aquafresh Toothpaste People,

I think your product is pretty all right. I don't use it (I'm a Mentadent man, you see), but my sister seems to love it. I was just writing in regards to your "Extreme Clean" brand toothpaste. The space-age packaging looks tremendous - no complaints there. The futuristic cap system and silver, metallic tube are completely necessary and lend an aura of authority to the product. However, I do question your decision to name this particular flavor "Original Experience." Personally, I have never thought of brushing my teeth to be as much an "experience" as something that I do to keep Momso and The Girl in New York happy. But I'm sure you know what you're doing. Well, Happy Festivus and a New Year filled with lots of other great experiences to you and your families. Cheers!

Hugs and Kisses,


At 3:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whaddya pissed about being boris zukoff? Joe anybody can remember nikolai volkoff, but its nothing short of a complement to dig up his fellow comrad in The Bolsheviks. Sure, they were defeated in 8 seconds by the Hart Foundation at Wrestlemania VI, but thats certainly no reflection of your abilities as a person, Drew. I'm sure you could take The Hitman and The Anvil to atleast 10-15 seconds more...just don't get worked up in that national anthem of yours.

At 12:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i just noticed a tube of the very same toothpaste in my parents' medicine cabinet. see, my question is, if you can make a toothpaste that provides "Extreme Clean," why not do away with all the other varieties? i mean, if they have the goods, why not make ALL of their toothpaste Extreme Clean? do they have customers who are just into "Kinda Clean" or "Clean More or Less"?

yeah, that's what i thought. swindling bastards.


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